How exciting is it when you get that Hermes notification that your parcel will be delivered today?! Oh the thrill of it. I’m a sucker for finding a parcel in the porch and ripping into it as soon as I’m home from work.
That being said, I’m also heavily aware that we are being sold to like never before. A few years ago I only got outfit envy by looking at other girls in the pub or flicking through Glamour magazine. Now, it's absolutely everywhere; forget outfit envy, social media has given rise to outfit anxiety and I think it’s time for some retail rehab.
Some people are addicted to booze, drugs, fags or even gambling. Some people can’t quit QVC at 3am and others seriously struggle to walk past the ice cream aisle unscathed. Addiction comes in all shapes and sizes and in varying extremes. I’m addicted to new clothes. Seriously. I firmly believe were some awful tragedy to happen I would drown myself in credit card debt and wash away my woes with clothes. My husband would guzzle red wine by the gallon; we’ve all got our demons and mine live in Manchester Arndale.
I don’t spend a lot. Or I try not to. What I will do is save a shit ton of stuff in my saved items and then stress myself out deciding what I should buy, whether I can afford it and if I even need it at all. I regularly tell myself ‘buying that will not make your life better’ and yet I still find myself hunting down spare hangers for the things I know I didn’t need to buy. The worst is when I order it, it arrives, I realise I don’t like it that much afterall and I have to faff about sending it back. What a waste of precious time all for the fun of going ‘straight to checkout’.
When I was younger and would rack up £300 in one spree and deal with the debt later. Nowadays my spending is entirely under control. What isn’t is the hunt for the high that buying new clothes brings. Many a morning I’ve been late for work because I got stuck in a scroll hole. I’ve wasted way too much time window shopping knowing I can’t afford anything but feeling the rising panic of ‘what if it sells out’.
Second Hand September seriously got me thinking about the effect all this fast fashion has on me and on the environment. So I’m detoxing; unsubscribing from the mailing lists, deleting my apps (this one scares me) and leaving my credit cards at home. This isn’t a blanket ban on buying new clothes; I will undoubtedly need the odd wardrobe update to keep me going. No, it’s the high from the buy that I need to wean myself off, the instant injection of happiness that wares off before I’ve even put it on. Here’s hoping for a healthier relationship with fashion and more time actually watching Netflix without one eye on ASOS. I’m checking out, and this time there’ll be no confirmation email required.